Lmao. Mario and I had quite the experience this weekend. On Monday, we decided to go gym shopping. The first gym was nice. Smaller but brand new awesome equipment (complete with Bob the treadmill!). So we got all the information. The guy's name was "Chad"...of course it was and he was like TOTALLY gnarly..but still a cool guy. No-pressure, etc.
AND THEN WE WENT TO GYM #2.......lol. oh my we should have stopped at Gym 1. It was everything we didn't want it to be. Okay so this chick gives me the third degree about who I made the appointment with, etc. and I kid you not...she had one eye that totally wandered the whole time. And I mean, I'm not trying to hate..you all know I'm down with MY PEOPLE..but seriously, who taught this girl how to talk. "Okay so um ya, like I'm going to show you the cardio room....so like that's it and uh..ya. Okay and there's a pool, okay ya and then there's like a raquetball court..so YA and there's tanning beds for all of our members, so like do you guys want to join OR WHAT". We were like uh..OR WHAT. This girl was a hot mess...and slightly chubby (not that I'm one to judge) but when she looked me up and down and was like "I mean, you like totally need to work with trainers because you know, like uh we know what we're doing and could help you lose weight..so YA". I was like uh....YOU? or that chubbIER trainer we saw when we first walked in that gave Mo THE EYE....ugh. After 20 times of trying to let La Lazy Eye know that we were NOT signing up for her smelly, raunchy gym we walked out of their cracking up....goodness gracious!
My second not so funny-at-the-moment-but-funny-now story happened to me today. I went on my jog/walk in the parking lot by myself again. Only this time it was dark outside. Probably stupid to go because I kept looking over my shoulder to make sure I wasn't getting jumped....which I didn't...UNTIL...I got to lap 7...whereupon I met HIM...a pinche perro. Ya'll..a pitbull looking perro..looking at me like homegirl, you need to get to stepping. I had no clue what to do, so I slowly turned around and walked away....I get to the end of the driveway and make the mistake of turning around to look through the fence..and all I see is PINCHE PERRO running straight towards the way I had just left..girls...let me tell you. I didn't realize I was as fast as I was.....I took off RUNNING, like RUNNING! I guess by the time he reached the exit, he couldn't tell what direction I went because I didn't see him again.
Anyway, the moral of the story is, don't run in deserted parking lots..because if you aren't worrying about some creepy creep creeping up on you, you will be haunted by pinche perro....
The end...
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2 comments:
I am so sorry but I had to LMAO through that whole thing. And the pinche perro! I would have shit my pants right THERE!!! OMG! I guess fear brings out the best in us....cause I would have ran my asthmatic overweight self out of there too!
Glad you were safe from the pinche pero! That's scary!
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