Good Friday

This has nothing to do with fitness or being healthy except that it has majorly affected my mental health for the day.

I called in to work because I didn't realize the girls had an inservice day today. So I called in to stay home with them. We had a busy day planned, part of it including a picnic at the park. Suddenly I get a call from a coworker/friend. She asked if I had talked to BB (my sister--yes, we have the same nickname..lol). I said no and asked why. She said there was just a fight right now so maybe call her to see if she's okay and not too stressed. No big deal. Sadly, it's not a school day if there isn't at least one fight. But I call her and she answers the phone, her voice shaking. I asked if she was okay and she said she had just gotten socked in the face trying to break up a fight. I said wait..who's fighting. And she said EVERYONE B, everyone! The entire quad had small groups fighting, objects being thrown, word was that a a knife was pulled out, there were about 20 cops there. I asked her if she wanted me to come in and she said I gotta GO as they called her on the radio.

Now if you know me, then you know I threw on the closest real clothes I could find, and left Mickey in charge and drove to school. What I saw was surreal. The entire campus was clear, seriously with our truant situation, that is not normal. But the parking lot was strewn with cop cars. And they were parked all crazy like they had just pulled up and run out of their cars. I walked towards my office and saw a small group of students near some officers, yelling at some students in a nearby classroom, calling them out to fight. With a quickness I left confused, baffled, nervous mode and hit mean, tyranical mom mode.

I yelled at the kids outside to not make things worse for themselves and went over to that classroom where of course, a sub was present (no offense Gina--it wasn't a YOU kind of sub). When I walked in, the kids had torn the classroom apart and the sub said they had been banging on the door, windows, screaming yelling, etc. I told her just to give me a list of the parents that i DIDNT have to call and oh man I went into hurt your feelings lecture mode. I told them who do you think you are to disrespect this school, this classroom, these teachers and officers this way? Would your mom like it if I came to your home and tore it apart? You kids think this is the real world you're in in here and that your a bunch of bad asses. You start fights with each when there's cops & teachers nearby because you know they'll stop them. You're not going to do anything so stop playing the role. Yes, you're stuck inside for a ridiculously long time. Yes, you're being held because of something you didn't do, but your reaction to the situation is up to you and you failed miserably. You are not 3 year olds who can't be trusted to behave like respectful young people.

One of the kids says, but we didn't do nothing. I said doing nothing..in this situation is as bad as doing something wrong. If you're not helping the situation, you're making it worse. I am giving you 3 minutes to get this room back in order and those that get up and do SOMETHING will not receive a call home from me. They all sat there and stared at me. I looked at them and semi-smirked and said, ya, you guys are right....YOU are the young people who are happy to "do nothing"...BOOM they sprang into action and fixed that room from top to bottom. I told them that if I heard one more SOUND from their room, their parents would know of the situation before they even got home. When that poor sub left she was shaking. She thanked me for helping her and I apologized to her for her welcome to our school.

In any case, from there I had a version of the Breakfast Club in my classroom so I had to supervise them for 5 minutes and then escorted them off campus. The entire school was on Code Blue (look it up. lol) and it took about 45 minutes to completely evacuate the school. I'm telling you, it was madness. And I am carrying a huge amount of guilt for not being there to help my sister when the initial riot broke out. After school she thanked me for coming. Come on, how could I not? Mickey said that he feels God kept me home with them to protect me. I know he's right but I still feel bad about it. The good thing is she got a lot of praise and recognition for her role today which is great because she's been so shaky about being in the position as campus monitor for the last few weeks. She is just subbing until the end of the school year but I think she proved that she can handle herself. I'm very proud of her!

Good Friday. I know today is nothing compared to the sacrafice that was made for me during Good Friday. It is only through my faith and the ultimate example of compassion that I can try to make sense of what moves young people to behave in such a destructive, hateful manner. I need that faith to continue on and not punish every child for the mistakes of those before him. I know they are lost and I am so grateful that I do not have that lost feeling myself and am raising three young people to have that feeling of security and love in their spirituality, each other and their culture. Come Tuesday of their return, their slate is wiped clean and I will look at them again as what they are...children.

And to end all this rambling with the song that brought me to weeping tears during Good Friday service tonight...

Amazing Grace
How sweet the sound
that saved a wretch like me.

I once was lost,
but now I'm found.
Was blind but now I see.